Two

Sunday Night 11 PM:

 

Walk into my room, put my cup of tea on the night stand, pull the blankets back and look at my bed and think – you look like you need me.

 

Climb in and turn on the TV.

 

Search for ‘Ghost Adventures’ in queue, press play. Relax.

Suddenly, I realize my auto pay is going to draft on Monday. Sit up, sigh and grab my tablet.

 

Log onto bank, transfer savings to checking.

 

*Unable to complete request*

Try again.

*Unable to complete request*

Try again

*Unable to complete request*

 

Zak Bagans voice in the background: “Was this ghost being a smart ass?

 

Get irritated.

 

Call bank. Bank closed, auto-tree gives no option to transfer.

Log back into bank, search for deposit options.

 

Read: ‘Take a picture using our app or deposit at any ATM – It’s that easy.’

 

Push blankets off me, get out of bed, and look for deposit slip. Not in file folder, not in safe, not in shoebox.

 

Make loud groan.

 

Dig into boxes in closet; look in nightstand drawer – found it! Relax.

 

Write out slip, log into app, and take a picture.

*Unable to complete request*

Try again.

*Unable to complete request*

Try again.

*Unable to complete request*

 

Make louder groan, toss phone onto bed. Go to drawer, find pants, put them on. Grab hoodie, pull it over my head – hood still on, put on snow boots, put on parka, grab keys, wallet and deposit slip.

 

Walk out the door.

Fuck. It’s snowing.

 

Get into truck, put keys into ignition, start it. Drive.

Pull into bank ATM drive-thru.

Fuck it’s too short.

 

Reverse. Throw car into park – get out.

 

Put in card, enter pin. Select deposit. Enter deposit slip. ATM spits it out.

*Unable to complete request*

Eyes get big, face getting red.

This time shout: FUCK!

 

Try again.

 

*Unable to complete request*

Shout fuck, slam hands at sides of ATM, kick ATM, shout FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!

 

“Ma’am?”

 

Turn around; it’s a police officer – huge sigh.

 

Start thinking: Oh my god…Great, he’s white and I look like I could check the ‘yes’ box on any affirmative action form.

Me breathing hard: “yeah?”

“Ma’am do you know why I stopped?” he asks, staring down at my stupid velour pants tucked into my stupid snow boots.

 

“…Because I didn’t see you first?”

 

He looks at me confused and winces back, “umm…no. I stopped because you’re kicking an ATM, I could arrest you for destruction of property.”

 

Looking at him like he’s a Grand Dragon, “Bullshit.”

 

“No, I absolutely can.”

 

He’s walking closer. Shit. Shit. Shit. I’m going to jail over an ATM.

 

As he’s nearing he starts, “Look, I bank here and they have limited access on Sunday nights. What were you trying to do, maybe I can help?”

 

“I was trying to deposit money from my savings to my checking, it was down online and I half of my monthly bills on auto pay coming out tomorrow.”

 

He nods and leans in, “Lemme’ see your deposit slip.” I hand him my deposit slip he looks it over and darts his eyes back at me with a half smile.

 

“This is a savings deposit slip, Alicia – that’s your name, right?”

 

Stupidly, I respond, “Yeah, do you need to see my ID?”

 

“That’d be great, yeah and your debit card.”

 

I move my head back and give him a suspicious look.

“Look…Alicia…I have a body camera on me, there’s also a camera on the ATM. You look pretty guilty, so don’t think I’m trying to rob you.”

 

I walk a little closer and hand him my card and ID, he inserts the card into the ATM.

 

“What’s your PIN number?”

“4534”

He selects transfer, from savings to checking.

“Okay how much?”

 

“Twenty hundred?” I say under my breath. Him looking at me, “huh?”

I sigh…”twenty five.”

 

Confused, he confirms, “Twenty five hundred?”

 

Looking down, now a little embarrassed, “Um no … It was uh, it was twenty-five dollars.”

He transfers the money and finishes, hands me my card and my cash and looks at me sternly, “You almost went to jail over twenty-five bucks? How is that half of your monthly bills?”

 

Scratching my wrist, I look at down, “Well I have my Netflix and my HULU  subscript-”

 

“Ma’am, you need anger management classes!”

 

My eyes still on the ground, feeling chastised, “I know”.

 

I can see him shaking his head as he radios to his patrol. “Please don’t kick the ATM again and maybe do this earlier in the day next time.”

 

He sighs and turns around and walks to his car.

 

“Okay….thanks.” I stood there, forgetting what I needed to do.

 

Suddenly, I look up to the officer shouting at me though his window.

 

“…Go home Alicia!”

 

Get into car, shut the door – scream.
 

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One comment

  1. xoraxer · February 4, 2016

    The anger we sometimes get when we lose certain commodities. I think we all have been that person. Great job and cheers!

    Liked by 1 person

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